Pocket money: agree what your child pays for

Start by deciding which purchases your child will pay for with pocket money. The Dutch financial information platform Wijzer in geldzaken recommends choosing an amount based on your budget and the expenses it needs to cover. Another family’s amount need not be your starting point. As a practical exercise, draw two columns on a sheet: purchases your child pays for and purchases you continue to cover. A small present or an item your child wants can be examples to discuss, rather than compulsory spending categories. Then agree a regular payment day. The source suggests weekly pocket money from around six years old, at an agreed day and time.

Make the spending agreement specific while leaving room for your child to make choices. Talk about what the money may pay for, what it may not pay for and which costs remain yours. Ask your child to explain the agreement in their own words. You could write down short statements together: I pay for this, my parent pays for that, and I do not use my pocket money for this. A written note is a practical way to keep a record of the conversation. Put any uncertain purchase on a separate list of questions to discuss. If you later change the costs your child must cover, revisit whether the agreed amount still fits those costs.

Discuss saving separately from money available to spend. Wijzer in geldzaken recommends agreeing how much to put aside and mentions a money box or bank account as options. Ask your child what they want to save for and add that goal to your agreement. As an optional planning step, make a note of what is already saved and what remains to reach the goal. Choose a record you both understand, such as a note kept beside the money box. The source recommends cash pocket money and reviewing spending together when using digital payments. Make the conversation about purchases as well as the remaining balance, rather than looking at the balance alone.

Decide what you will do when the pocket money has run out before that happens. Wijzer in geldzaken advises against topping it up too quickly and against using it as a punishment or reward. At the start, discuss when the next payment is due and what your child can still afford in the meantime. If a purchase leads to regret, ask calmly what they bought and what choice they might make next time. Keep that discussion focused on spending rather than judging their behaviour. Refer to the agreement if either of you is unsure what was decided. If you want to change a rule, discuss it together and record the new agreement for future reference.

Sources, accessed on 2026-10-02

• Wijzer in geldzaken